Read about the "imposter syndrome." It's very common for new teachers of any subject to worry that they aren't fully competent to teach it.

Erica,
I've been checking out your blog for a while now - it's very inspiring for a new yoga teacher like myself to read about others going through the same experience. I have passed along the Excellent Blog award to you in recognition of your great blog and gave you kudos on my blog Yoga Mama: http://ramamama.blogspot.com/2008/02/more-gratitude.html

Namaste!

Perhaps this is another factor I should consider in my debate on whether or not to become a teacher. Also, you are an official recipient of an E for excellence blog award. I received it from http://GroundingThroughTheSitBones.blogspot.com and have passed it on to my 10 favorite bloggers. If you would like to accept the award, please list 10 favorites of your own!

It just comes to show, that in the modern society people who turn to yoga are the ones who are already screwed up.

They just use it as a distraction from their hopelessly lonely and insecure lives - the same way others turn to shopping or eating. That's all there is to it - self-pity and self-punishment, not self awareness and enlightenment. No wonder every yoga class has its token anorexic.

Yoga won't sort your lives out - not if you use as an escape rather than a tool.

Too funny! I just had a teaching nightmare that I had an unruly class that wouldn't calm down so I could teach. When I taught the next morning I told my students about it, and they thought it was hysterical. They were a very well behaved class for me :)

Shanti!

Erica, your post made me laugh out loud and *namaste hands* at the screen... I'm also 23 and a student teacher - thanks so much for sharing your journey :)

wow,

in response to lucy's comment below... i would say that this blog is more indicative that even the teacher is still a student. we are all human and all have a long journey to enlightenment ahead of us.

in response to the blog itself, have you tried meditation shortly before bed? i listen to a guided meditation cd before i sleep and it took away my crazy dreams in addition to curing my insomnia. it is always difficult to let go of the world we live in, but somewhere around the first chakra where i am asked to let go of rules that do not belong to me i tend to relax.

:)

I too am a yoga teacher, and and have also had job nightmares- including a yoga teaching nightmare. I was about to begin teaching in a new place. In my nightmare at the first class there were well over a hundred students who were completely unruly. Some were eating, talking to each other or on their cell phones... None of them were paying any attention to my instructions! I usually don't remember my dreams, but that one I cannot shake off.

Fantastic! I've had em too. I am a new teacher and when I had my first teaching anxiety dream I felt: I HAVE ARRIVED. Now this is my career. It's not a job without work nightmares. It's part of you. I've been reading your blog forever. It's wonderful!!

Best Wishes.

Erica, to me, it sounds like your question doesn't have to do with our profession, but more to do with where you are at in your development of consciousness.
However, I have worried about my students calling me a fraud. I think this comes from the fact that I don't have those magical three letters at the end of my name that is becoming more and more of a requirement these days - RYT.
Where I live, in the Albany, NY area, a large and serious Kundalini Yoga studio went out of business within the last year or two. Since then, I have had more students who used to go to that studio entering my classes. Some of them come in with expectations and I served something they weren't expecting. I've gotten some nasty comments from those students.
One semester, it really got to me - it must have been the first semester and it caused me a lot of angst and became distracting to my teaching because i would worry about it while I was in front of them; I started to worry that my quality of instruction was slipping.

- I teach in the After-school Continuing Education venue; I love it because it reminds me of how I discovered yoga; I found the most incredible instructor teaching at Gold's Gym, of all places! I am in love with the fact that I can offer high quality yoga instruction that is affordable for almost anyone! -

In its own time, I realized that what I needed to do to resolve this with the students and within myself was to reveal my "real person" self, to give myself the space to make mistakes like any other person, but also to work on modifying the class towards the general level of the group. Focusing on that was very helpful... it took me from teaching rather strictly from my background to being much more flexible with my students! I have to say, I really feel quite GRAND now in my classroom. I have great students, love my people, and I feel that they love me the same. This year, I am taking the class beyond the school for the summertime - I'm bringing my group to another space so that we can continue our practice together and I don't lose them come next Fall.
What I ended up realizing was that all of that fear was just that... just a PERCEPTION, actually. I ended up with such a good number of return students from that same semester to the next, so... what did I need to be so concerned about?
I had more time to revisit that whole scenario after that semester ended, during a break that lasted several weeks before the next semester started up. I put lots of thought into how I would introduce myself and the pace I would set. I ended up going into that next first class telling them how much thought I'd been putting into it, dumping all that preparation away, and pointing out some of the most important items that I felt they should know.
Have no fear... you have the resolution within to create a great space for you to teach in. Reach inside and find your greatness, your SPIRIT that makes you a fantastic teacher! It's there. I don't have to meet you to know it's there. You didn't become a Yoga Teacher by accident.
;)

Hi folks, Erica and everyone else having bad dreams, maybe it's because you're conscientious? It doesn't seem to be about yoga per se, for Erica anyhow, so maybe you're just mulling over how to do it better. Great!
The other thing that strikes me is, y'all are worried about 3 letters? I'm sure you all have inspiring yoga teachers in your past, just like you had that amazing English/ Maths/ Biology teacher. They were (are) great because they know their stuff. Would you still be teaching if you were so lousy?Nobody would come! You must be imparting useful things to lots of people everytime you teach, even if you're not perfect (yet!). Keep it up. You're definitely inspiring someone, and I know that in Lawsuit Land it's important to have the letters, but it's your own practice that comes through in the class.
And since I'm blathering away here, I'll just finish by mentioning that yoga's a reflection of and tool for life, not for "yoga" per se. It can be a livlihood too, but that's not its essence.
See ya.

I've had a few nightmares where I ended up teaching up naked! I woke up feeling so exposed and confused! One time I dreamed I was teaching in the middle of the mall and couldn't get my students to concentrate or listen to my directions. Needless to say, I'm a little crazy about the setting in my class...And I'm alwys doing a double take before I leave the house to make sure I'm FULLY DRESSED!