Making Time to Meditate

I used to meditate.  I’d sit up in bed with my dog Salem cuddled next to
me, trying to watch–and then release–my thoughts for ten or twenty
minutes each morning. 

It wasn’t easy finding the discipline to
sit. Every morning I struggled to get myself to meditate before making
coffee, but meditation left me feeling clearer, less anxious and
slightly less attached (in a good way) to what would happen to me that
day.

Then I had a baby.

Photo: My dog Salem keeps me company while I meditate.

While it took me six
months to return to asana practice, it was two full years before I could
even think about renewing my morning meditation practice.  Finally, a
few months ago I read Dani Shapiro’s new spiritual memoir, Devotion.  Her descriptions of
starting a meditation practice inspired me to want to sit again.

To
be honest, I was equally motivated by the exhaustion-induced headaches I
was getting most afternoons, which I hoped meditating could help
alleviate. I realized I was craving peace and quiet–two things not
exactly found in abundance with a toddler running around–and with no
spa vacation or silent retreat in my immediate future, mediation seemed a
cheap and relatively doable option.

Nowadays, I sit for twenty
minutes in the morning – in Virasana (Hero’s Pose),
perched on a wooden block in my yoga corner first thing after brushing
my teeth.  Something about starting my day calmly changes everything
else that comes afterward.  While meditation used to feel good, now
those few minutes of quiet feel essential.

Of course, meditating
with a lively two year old in the house is a challenge.  Finding the
time to meditate has meant getting up a little earlier, changing our
morning routine, and bargaining with my husband Neil about what time he
leaves for work. And there are times–when we’re sick, or when
Neil travels for work–that meditating in the morning seems impossible.
On those days, I try to make child care my meditation.  (Here I am
reading my son a book, here I am changing a diaper, mindfully…)

But
now that I am once again meditating most mornings, my life truly has
changed.  Well, my life hasn’t changed, but the way I feel about my life
has: I’m calmer, happier, more free. I’m less
exhausted by the evening, and I find myself making saner decisions all
day long.

If you would like to start or re-start your meditation practice, my advice is to start small: Try two minutes of
quiet sitting a day.  (You can gradually add on from there, but the key
thing is to just get started and get into the habit.)  If I
don’t meditate first thing I never will, but this won’t work for
everyone.  Maybe your two–or eventually twenty–minutes will be in
the evening after you put your baby to sleep, or right after dropping
your child off at preschool, or at your desk right before an important
meeting.

Don’t worry about technique.  Just find a comfortable
seated posture and let your thoughts go.  Keep bringing yourself back to
the present, to the feel of the chair or block or cushion beneath you,
or perhaps remember your breath.  (I like to focus on the sounds outside my
window: rain, birds, wind, even a car driving by.)  Allow yourself the
freedom to take a break for a sip of water, or a stretch.  There are no
rules.  On the best days, maybe just for a moment you will feel
your consciousness lift.

Are you a mom who mediates? How do you
carve out the time?  How does it change the rest of your day?

Jessica
Berger Gross is the author of enLIGHTened:
How I Lost 40 Pounds with a Yoga Mat, Fresh Pineapples, and a Beagle
Pointer (Skyhorse), she lives in Vancouver,
British Columbia with her husband and two-year-old son.